So you know that blog on God's Faithfulness I promised ... it's still coming ... it just isn't this one
This one is on ... what it's like until God's faithfulness to His promises is fulfilled in your life (crummy title ... so I went with something else ;D) On that note, the title for this blog comes from something I heard the other night.
I was discussing with some friends of mine (that I cherish, trust, and respect greatly) the unfulfilled promises of God in my life, and I was expressing how frustrated I am with waiting. That there is no real semblance of that promise being fulfilled in my life at the moment, but God is adamant that He has it, and has it "soon." So, my friend explained a teaching he and his wife had recently heard on Frustration vs Irritation. The difference being that frustration is not only normal, it's ok! Wait, what?!?! Yes ...
Frustration, is terms of life with Christ, is when you are in a certain place. Knowing you are within God's will in that place ... no rebellion ... you are where you are 'supposed' to be. Now, in that place God is telling you all about this thing He has ... this awesome promise. In my case this is a promise He's been talking about for 6.5 years, and more frequently recently, but again NOTHING in my actual reality to say that it's really gonna happen. Anyway, so you are standing in the will of God, and God is telling you about this thing He has for you ... but you aren't there yet ... the space between those two realities is Frustration. I can't tell you how much sense that made to me in that moment.
I've become accustomed to ... what I like to call ... 'mourning the promises of God.' I had, what I will call a revelation, on this subject while doing a recent fast. I have been spending a lot of time reading, and identifying, with the Prophets. During this fast, I hit a point where I was overcome with sorrow, and my spirit was grieving. This is an odd sensation to have, especially when God is saying it's ok to feel that way. I sought Him for an explanation on what I was experiencing, and He showed me, through reading the accounts and writings of the prophets, that I was mourning the things in God's heart that are yet undone. It was a regular thing for the Prophets of the OT to 'fast and mourn.'
I want to first take a moment to expound on that, as a means of encouragement to you reading this. Because, this was a beautiful thing for me to get to experience. God's heart to bring me that promise is so great, and because of that there is a literal spiritual mourning for it to be accomplished. He doesn't make promises that He isn't prepared to 'make good on.' God doesn't promise us things as lip service to our desires. If it is truly a promise from God, you better believe He will do it. It may not be when you want, but IT WILL BE DONE! Thank you JESUS!
so ... Grieving the unfulfilled promises of God is normal ... but what you do with it ... that's the tricky part.
I know for me getting to a place of self-pity from that place of mourning is not only easy ... it's almost automatic. That is a scary and unhealthy place to go. God doesn't want us soooooo fixed on the future that we miss out on the now. The blessings and beauty of where you are right now are experiences you will never get back if you neglect or waste them. SO DON'T WASTE THEM!
If you allow yourself to become depressed or overcome with grief then you are actually doubting that God will do what He said, you are placing your own perception over the wisdom and Word of God. That mourning feeling is actually such an encouragement to me ... I KNOW God is going to do it ... I don't need to doubt it, fear it, or question it. God's will be done. Amen!
My closing statement hopefully will be the best of this whole thing ...
God doesn't give us promises so we will fixate on them, ponder them, try to figure out how they will be done. He gives us them to free us from all that. So that we KNOW that is already something on God's heart for us, so we can focus on OTHER THINGS! So, trust God. Whatever your promise is ... Let it go, knowing it's in good hands.
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Friday, February 11, 2011
His Faithfulness ... versus Ours
Two week sago, God told me to write a blog on His faithfulness. This is not that blog ... that blog is still in the works ... this blog was inspired by that one, but it is about our faithfulness.
Last night a friend and I were at Walmart (don't judge me! I needed envelopes and couldn't find them anywhere else ... or there for that matter) So as we walk in, Maria looks at me and says, we should talk to someone! What's the first three things that come into your mind when you think of someone. So I stopped, and God gave me 2 things: curly red hair, blue shirt. So the hunt was on. It was kind of funny how many people we saw with red hair and blue shirts, but each time, we both knew, it wasn't her.
So we stole away to a remote area, and asked God again, where is she? God gave me: yellow, go back to frozen foods. Sure enough, as we entered the frozen foods section we noticed the distinctly yellow walls. As we turned a corner, there crouching on the ground was a girl about our age, with long curly strawberry blond hair, and a blue shirt on, stocking shelves adjacent to the cold foods section.
At this, we both stopped, dare I say froze. We didn't know what to say, how to approach her. I felt like we needed to ask if we could pray for her, and Maria said she really felt like this girl was at the end of her rope, verging on depression. As we stood there, maybe 100 feet away from who we called "Tiffany", we delayed and delayed. The longer we were there the more I felt the strength of God's love and heart for her, but my own fear and "over-thinking nature" made us miss our opportunity to talk to her.
That's right, as we doddled by the frozen cookie dough, Tiffany took her cart of candies and gums, and headed into the back storage area of the store. We took off as quickly as possible when we saw her move, but it was too late, she disappeared through the over-sized double doors, and was gone. We stood around, admittedly a bit creepily, but those doors for nearly 20 minutes waiting for her tom come back, and she never did. We took another cruise around the store, hoping she came out another set of doors, but she was nowhere to be found. We had missed it.
I can't explain to you the feeling in my chest when we realized she we weren't going to get another chance to talk to Tiffany. My heart fully ached, and I was overcome with sorrow. I literally verbally repented in the middle of Walmart. My soul was downcast within me. In that moment I realized how unfaithful I am, and disobedient to Word of the Lord.
That made me think about our faithfulness, and the impact it has on our lives, and those around us. The idea that God ... the Guy who made EVERYTHING! God, speaks to us. That's crazy right?? He talks to us, involves us in His plans. Now, He doesn't do anything by accident, He doesn't do anything without purpose. So, if God, the Creator of heaven and earth, tells you something or asks you to do something, then odds are its not a mistake or a casual suggestion on His behalf.
God is looking for faithful servants. He is looking for people He can entrust the things of His kingdom to. He is looking for people who will hear the faintest command of His heart, and run after it!
No questions, no hesitations, no excuses.
Distrust of the Word of the Lord? Distrust of ourselves? Laziness? Fear? Selfishness? Whatever the cause of disobedience may be, it doesn't validate or justify standing by the cookie dough, and watching a girl walk away. It doesn't excuse missing the opportunity to be faithful to the commands, leadings, or directions of God. (** don't mishear me, I understand grace and mercy, but we will still held accountable to what we did or didn't do for His Kingdom**)
Being a Christian doesn't mean you go to church, go to Bible study, and tell God all the things you want. It means being in a relationship with the Man Jesus, and serving the Lord God. Serving in obedience out of love for Him through Jesus. That's it.
So, what is God telling you? What is He talking to you about? Who has he put on your heart to talk to? THEN DO IT! Cast all your fear on Jesus, and RUN!!!!!!
Trust me, the fear of stepping our it faith now will not compare to the dissapointment and despair of looking into Jesus's face, and He says He doesn't know you.
Be encourage, be blessed, be obedient!!!
Last night a friend and I were at Walmart (don't judge me! I needed envelopes and couldn't find them anywhere else ... or there for that matter) So as we walk in, Maria looks at me and says, we should talk to someone! What's the first three things that come into your mind when you think of someone. So I stopped, and God gave me 2 things: curly red hair, blue shirt. So the hunt was on. It was kind of funny how many people we saw with red hair and blue shirts, but each time, we both knew, it wasn't her.
So we stole away to a remote area, and asked God again, where is she? God gave me: yellow, go back to frozen foods. Sure enough, as we entered the frozen foods section we noticed the distinctly yellow walls. As we turned a corner, there crouching on the ground was a girl about our age, with long curly strawberry blond hair, and a blue shirt on, stocking shelves adjacent to the cold foods section.
At this, we both stopped, dare I say froze. We didn't know what to say, how to approach her. I felt like we needed to ask if we could pray for her, and Maria said she really felt like this girl was at the end of her rope, verging on depression. As we stood there, maybe 100 feet away from who we called "Tiffany", we delayed and delayed. The longer we were there the more I felt the strength of God's love and heart for her, but my own fear and "over-thinking nature" made us miss our opportunity to talk to her.
That's right, as we doddled by the frozen cookie dough, Tiffany took her cart of candies and gums, and headed into the back storage area of the store. We took off as quickly as possible when we saw her move, but it was too late, she disappeared through the over-sized double doors, and was gone. We stood around, admittedly a bit creepily, but those doors for nearly 20 minutes waiting for her tom come back, and she never did. We took another cruise around the store, hoping she came out another set of doors, but she was nowhere to be found. We had missed it.
I can't explain to you the feeling in my chest when we realized she we weren't going to get another chance to talk to Tiffany. My heart fully ached, and I was overcome with sorrow. I literally verbally repented in the middle of Walmart. My soul was downcast within me. In that moment I realized how unfaithful I am, and disobedient to Word of the Lord.
That made me think about our faithfulness, and the impact it has on our lives, and those around us. The idea that God ... the Guy who made EVERYTHING! God, speaks to us. That's crazy right?? He talks to us, involves us in His plans. Now, He doesn't do anything by accident, He doesn't do anything without purpose. So, if God, the Creator of heaven and earth, tells you something or asks you to do something, then odds are its not a mistake or a casual suggestion on His behalf.
God is looking for faithful servants. He is looking for people He can entrust the things of His kingdom to. He is looking for people who will hear the faintest command of His heart, and run after it!
No questions, no hesitations, no excuses.
Distrust of the Word of the Lord? Distrust of ourselves? Laziness? Fear? Selfishness? Whatever the cause of disobedience may be, it doesn't validate or justify standing by the cookie dough, and watching a girl walk away. It doesn't excuse missing the opportunity to be faithful to the commands, leadings, or directions of God. (** don't mishear me, I understand grace and mercy, but we will still held accountable to what we did or didn't do for His Kingdom**)
Being a Christian doesn't mean you go to church, go to Bible study, and tell God all the things you want. It means being in a relationship with the Man Jesus, and serving the Lord God. Serving in obedience out of love for Him through Jesus. That's it.
So, what is God telling you? What is He talking to you about? Who has he put on your heart to talk to? THEN DO IT! Cast all your fear on Jesus, and RUN!!!!!!
Trust me, the fear of stepping our it faith now will not compare to the dissapointment and despair of looking into Jesus's face, and He says He doesn't know you.
Be encourage, be blessed, be obedient!!!
Friday, January 14, 2011
Slow Fade. Quick Transition.
That's a phrase God has given me, repeatedly, describing the season He has me in, in relation to the season He's taking me into. This season will come to a slow fade, but the new season will hit me with a quick transition.
I must admit, I'm so excited, but I'm so intimidated as well. (If you read my facebook page wallpsosts, then some parts of this may be redundant. Sorry.) God has been really challenging me to live a deeper life with Him. To walk freely in the things He has called me to, and to freely walk away from the things that hold me back from Him and His will. I have been (attempting) to spend at least 2 hours in the prayer room, at the International House of Prayer, every morning before I go to the office. This has been such a struggle, getting up at 5 am is not exactly my favorite thing ever. Proverbs 20:13, a warning against loving sleep, is something that I have really been weighing since I started this, lets call it a regiment, of 6am prayer. The days I sleep in and have to go to the prayer room at night, instead of starting my day with Jesus, those days are noticeably different than the days that I am obedient to the word the God gave me. I feel off, I don't have focus, I don't know what God's will for my day is, because I didn't start my day asking Him, "what do I need to know about today, what do you want me to do today?"
That's the beautiful thing about God's commands to us, they are optional. They are always an open invitation, that we can run after with Him, or choose to ignore and stay with ourselves. That is one of the things that I am painfully learning in this time of "slow fade," how much of my life, and anyone's life, is "choose God, or choose you." Choosing me is usually so much easier, and I GET TO SLEEP! The flip side of that is: I don't have Jesus guiding my day, I don't have the Holy Spirit launching me into my day. I've experienced both, and as much as the up front of getting up at 5 am and in the prayer room by 6 is sometimes agitating, the backside of not is nearly unbearable.
With all of this, God has been so gracious and encouraging. He reminds me that Jesus is my all in all, I don't need anyone but Him. My flesh doesn't believe that statement, my flesh almost craves spiritual encouragement from people. (I'm not saying wanting to be encouraged is a bad thing, just keep tracking with me!) There are many people in my life who can speak into my life, encourage me, give me scripture, give me prophesy. You name it, people can usually do it. The thing the Lord keeps reminding me of is that we have that blessing because of community, but we don't need it. We have access to the Guy who is giving them the scripture, the words, the prayers. We have direct access, through Jesus, to the One who is the Author and Perfecter of our faith!! As much as it is great to have a confirmation of something through a Word of Encouragement or a scripture, if I'm not spending time with the Lord on my own, hearing from Him for myself, then there is nothing to confirm.
He so longs to speak to us! He longs to interact with us! Read Song of Solomon sometime. He loves us! He wants to interact with us ... WE get in the way. It's not Him, He is speaking, trust that. If we aren't hearing anything then it's because of us. I have found more often than not, if I am sitting in prayer, and I am having a hard time concentrating or connecting to the Lord, that if I ask the Holy Spirit to search me and show me my unrepentant sin, stuff comes up. After I forgive (if necessary), repent, and receive God's forgiveness ... it's almost amazing how much clearer my mind gets, how much freer I feel.
We are completely dependent on Him. That's the basis of everything He's teaching me right now. How incredibly dependent I am, or should be, on Him. Catastrophes don't seem as bad, going to bed early so I can get up early doesn't seem like a sacrifice, stepping out in faith in the things He asks me to do don't seem as scary. As long as I have my heart in the right place, in His hands, and my eyes on the right thing, His face. It all seems better, because He promises to help us, He promises to love us, He promises to be with us, even when it's hard or painful.
His promises are good. He keeps them. I promise!
I must admit, I'm so excited, but I'm so intimidated as well. (If you read my facebook page wallpsosts, then some parts of this may be redundant. Sorry.) God has been really challenging me to live a deeper life with Him. To walk freely in the things He has called me to, and to freely walk away from the things that hold me back from Him and His will. I have been (attempting) to spend at least 2 hours in the prayer room, at the International House of Prayer, every morning before I go to the office. This has been such a struggle, getting up at 5 am is not exactly my favorite thing ever. Proverbs 20:13, a warning against loving sleep, is something that I have really been weighing since I started this, lets call it a regiment, of 6am prayer. The days I sleep in and have to go to the prayer room at night, instead of starting my day with Jesus, those days are noticeably different than the days that I am obedient to the word the God gave me. I feel off, I don't have focus, I don't know what God's will for my day is, because I didn't start my day asking Him, "what do I need to know about today, what do you want me to do today?"
That's the beautiful thing about God's commands to us, they are optional. They are always an open invitation, that we can run after with Him, or choose to ignore and stay with ourselves. That is one of the things that I am painfully learning in this time of "slow fade," how much of my life, and anyone's life, is "choose God, or choose you." Choosing me is usually so much easier, and I GET TO SLEEP! The flip side of that is: I don't have Jesus guiding my day, I don't have the Holy Spirit launching me into my day. I've experienced both, and as much as the up front of getting up at 5 am and in the prayer room by 6 is sometimes agitating, the backside of not is nearly unbearable.
With all of this, God has been so gracious and encouraging. He reminds me that Jesus is my all in all, I don't need anyone but Him. My flesh doesn't believe that statement, my flesh almost craves spiritual encouragement from people. (I'm not saying wanting to be encouraged is a bad thing, just keep tracking with me!) There are many people in my life who can speak into my life, encourage me, give me scripture, give me prophesy. You name it, people can usually do it. The thing the Lord keeps reminding me of is that we have that blessing because of community, but we don't need it. We have access to the Guy who is giving them the scripture, the words, the prayers. We have direct access, through Jesus, to the One who is the Author and Perfecter of our faith!! As much as it is great to have a confirmation of something through a Word of Encouragement or a scripture, if I'm not spending time with the Lord on my own, hearing from Him for myself, then there is nothing to confirm.
He so longs to speak to us! He longs to interact with us! Read Song of Solomon sometime. He loves us! He wants to interact with us ... WE get in the way. It's not Him, He is speaking, trust that. If we aren't hearing anything then it's because of us. I have found more often than not, if I am sitting in prayer, and I am having a hard time concentrating or connecting to the Lord, that if I ask the Holy Spirit to search me and show me my unrepentant sin, stuff comes up. After I forgive (if necessary), repent, and receive God's forgiveness ... it's almost amazing how much clearer my mind gets, how much freer I feel.
We are completely dependent on Him. That's the basis of everything He's teaching me right now. How incredibly dependent I am, or should be, on Him. Catastrophes don't seem as bad, going to bed early so I can get up early doesn't seem like a sacrifice, stepping out in faith in the things He asks me to do don't seem as scary. As long as I have my heart in the right place, in His hands, and my eyes on the right thing, His face. It all seems better, because He promises to help us, He promises to love us, He promises to be with us, even when it's hard or painful.
His promises are good. He keeps them. I promise!
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